We all respond better to positive feedback. If someone ever
points out the negative in us, chances are we won’t improve because we get so caught
up in the negative.
Let’s say your daughter is receiving not-so-great grades in
school. In addition to helping her get the support she needs to bring up her
scores, it’s important to point out the things she is good at. That way you
build up her self-esteem to the point where she believes in herself and wants
to do better.
Being encouraging is the only way to get the best results
from people. It’s the secret weapon I use when I want people to perform better.
Instead of telling someone “Hey, you’re not really good at that.” I’ll say, “You’re
really good at X and all you have to do is try your best to improve Y.”
Sometimes, even the kindest people will discourage others
without even understanding what they’re doing. We all have those people in our
lives who we have to put up with, but we don’t agree with how they do things.
When you’ve known someone for so long and their track record has been to not
follow through, naturally you’re going to assume that every situation will be
the same. If you know someone like this, try something different next time you
want them to improve. Try to be encouraging. Show them that you believe in
them. They may not change right away, but with time they might make small steps
towards improvement.
A lot of the times, all we need is someone to believe in us
and to offer some positive reinforcement. Be that person to someone who rarely receives
that kind of encouragement.
xoxo
Loren
