We’ve all experienced work, romantic, friend or family relationships that feel one-sided, making you think after time you’re being used. You find yourself giving far more time, favors or support than you receive, and often the person in question vanishes on one of the rare occasions you request their help. A partner who only makes contact when they feel like it, a family member who guilt trips you into being at their beck and call, or a friend (or partner) who ghosts you for days, only resurfacing when it’s convenient for them to do so. Sound familiar? These people are users. They manipulate people for their own needs and possess a lack of empathy for other human beings.
5 Tell-Tale Signs You’re Being Used
One-sided relationships can suck the soul out of you. The more you try and motivate them to show you the love and support you need to fill a void, the more they will use you and deplete your energy levels. The best way to avoid these toxic relationships is to focus on you. Think self-care every day – do what makes you feel happy and loved, and stop depending on others for validation. Here are a few clear signs you’re being used and may need to start distancing yourself from the user(s) in your life.
#1. You can feel the lack of balance.
Relationships require effort and time. If they’re not putting either into you, it’s a one-sided situation. The people that genuinely care for you will always make an effort to make you feel like a priority in their life. No one is that busy – we all have time to allocate to the people that are important to us.
#2. They only show love when it’s convenient for them.
If someone is only loving and complimentary when they want something from you, they’re manipulating you. It’s typical to start questioning your self-worth in these types of relationships, which is why they’re so toxic. Avoid being around anyone who makes you feel like you’re hard to love or aren’t good enough.
#3. Your needs aren’t being considered or met.
Users rarely respect, honor, or care about anyone’s needs apart from their own. The small things they occasionally do for you are usually a devious power play which allows them to keep you around and asking for more favors.
#4. You’re stuck in a negative cycle.
Every time you’re about to give up and walk away from them because they never make time for you, they reel you back in with their charms, by turning up – suddenly wanting to spend time with you and shower you with compliments. This scenario screams that they are keeping you in limbo for their own selfish reasons until they find someone ‘better.’ No good comes from these relationships.
#5. You’re always paying.
They seem to be out a lot and always have new things, but plead poverty to guilt trip you into paying every time you spend time together. Run. Away. Fast.
